I'm a dinner lady
In a private school
Where the lips are so stiff
And Jack Wills is so cool
I wear a baseball cap
And thus branded a fool
But if you p*ss me off
Then you'll be eating my drool
When not stealing food
Or hiding in the loos
I'm dragged up on the hot counter to serve a ball of food
A fat teacher approaches
With a wobbly hip
And I politely inform her that we're all out of chips
She gives me a glare
As I bite my finger tips
I offer new potatoes and she absolutely flips
But then I ponder how hard her life must be
I mean it's all on a plate
Thanks to mama and daddy
But regardless of the car
And this cushy job
This b*tch won't settle without corn on the cob
And then one day
I got so bored and idle
Served enough sausage rolls to make me suicidal
To combat this state I had a wank in the quiche
And I watched the head master get it stuck to his teeth
A-a-a-a-a-oh
Ohhh
I'm a dinner lady
[?]
Oh I want a sausage roll
Suffice to say I wasn't bored any more
And I couldn't stop my laughing as I scrubbed up on the floor
And next time Jeffery's mother asked him what he had for tea
He can tell it was a fluid
That once belonged to me
Oh
It's all for me
I'm a dinner lady
It's all for me
Oh
I am a dinner lady
[?]
[?]
Life as a dinner lady
Oh and it's a true story
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