​lol my first rap ever, ignore this lyrics

[Intro]
I got how to start this sh*t

[Verse 1]
Yo, straight out the dungeons of suburban streets
I stay so deeply underground that no one’s heard of me
Murder the competition just through my emergence
Someone call a Goddamn ambulance, 'cause this an emergency
A regular night for you, you’re piteous with girls
'Cause you’re hideous, inert, and just an idiot with words
Like is the ‘Iliad’ an idiom, a pronoun or a verb?
Just shut the f*ck up, you’re makin' me seriously berserk
I’m lyrically absurd, I’ve got a myriad of work
These sl*ts think I’m a badass, miscreant alert
I’ve got trillions of girls in their skimpy little skirts
On my sofa at four in the morning, watching Phineas and Ferb

[Interlude]
Because I got records on my fingers and I just can't stop
(Don't stop!) I can't stop, I got a platypus controlling me

[Verse 2]
So I’m out at Starbucks, and I’m feeling like a mocha cap'
Now this blonde girl’s feeling me, so she approaches, and
I turned her down, 'cause I already had my quota met
She turns around all bummed out, and that’s when I notice that
The girl is wearing yoga pants, like, f*ck, she’s wearing yoga pants
Changed my mind, yoga pants, I f*cking love me yoga pants
Took her home and instantly she showed her breasts and moaned for sex
So I turned her over and f*cked her on the sofa bed
[Instrumental Break]

[Verse 3]
Look, when I say I have a lot of sex, well- I’m lyin'
'Cause when I f*ck while standin' up, my legs get tired
My ex doesn’t call back, she doesn’t text me either
'Cause when she asked me 'bout her c*nt, I told her her best friend was tighter
I’m notorious for inappropriately launching boners
I dated this heartless chick, I’m glad I got to know her
She took so much from me, now that’s all I get off to
So I invite corpses over so I can be their organ donors
I creep the corpses out of the morgue and free them
I keep the corpus in a bucket list, I’m Morgan Freeman
I f*ck the corpulent ones first, and more than frequent
My corporal narcolepsy tends to leave my mornings freakish

[Instrumental Break]

[Verse 4]
I used to watch a lot of porn, so I lack dopamine
So sexually, I’m darker than usual, like black Ovaltine
I’m the kind of guy you’d never quite catch smokin' weed
But jackin' off to horny horses f*ckin' fatass roped-up teens
And I’m not jokin', please, my sexual potency
Is directly proportional to how gross my kind of porn can be
Set a precedent, 'cause I spent time on redtube.com
Call me Oedipus, 'cause now I'm only turned on by hot moms
[Instrumental Break]

[Verse 5]
"You say 'b*tch' and 'sl*t' so much, you start every line with 'em"
b*tch, it’s not my fault that so many things tend to rhyme with 'em
Critics say my lyrics are too sexually prompted, listen
I talk about whatever, why the f*ck do you have a problem with ‘em?
I don’t give a sh*t whatever you’re f*cking calling it
It’s 'joke rap', 'nerdcore', 'hipster sh*t', it’s f*cking all of it
You’re false with it
You try to vaguely generalize, but you’re totally f*cking wrong with it’
Your mistakes make you seem like you’re nervous and tense
I’m cleverly on a beat like I’m worth double the best
Inhale deep, like the words of my breath
I never sleep, 'cause slee—

[Outro]
Nah, man, honestly, man, I feel a little tired
I'm gonna take a little power nap, but I'll-
Wa- ca- give me a wake up call
'Cause I can't get up myself