H. CHANDLER:
Are we gonna have a problem?
You got a bone to pick?
You’ve come so far,
Why now are you pulling on my di*k?
I’d normally slap your face off,
And everyone here could watch.
But I’m feeling nice.
Here’s some advice-
Listen up, biotch!
H. DUKE; H. MCNAMARA:
I like!
H. CHANDLER:
Lookin’ hot,
Buying stuff they cannot
H. DUKE; H. MCNAMARA:
I like!
H. CHANDLER:
Drinkin’ hard,
Maxin’ Dad’s credit card
H. DUKE; H. MCNAMARA:
I like!
H. CHANDLER:
Skippin’ gym
Scaring her
Screwing him
H. DUKE; H. MCNAMARA:
I like!
H. CHANDLER:
Killer clothes
HEATHERS:
Kickin’ nerds in the nose!
H. CHANDLER:
If you lack the balls
You can go play dolls
Let your mommy fix you a snack
H. DUKE; H. MCNAMARA:
Woah!
H. CHANDLER:
Or you could come smoke
Pound some rum and coke
In my Porsche with the quarterback.
HEATHERS:
Woah! Woah! Woah!
Honey, whatchu waitin’ for?
Welcome to my candy store
It’s time for you to prove
You’re not a loser anymore
And step into my candy store
H. CHANDLER; H. MCNAMARA:
Guys fall
H. DUKE:
At your feet
Pay the check
H. MCNAMARA:
Help you cheat
HEATHERS:
All you
H. DUKE:
Have to do
H. CHANDLER:
Say goodbye to Shamu!
HEATHERS:
That freak’s
H. MCNAMARA:
Not your friend
I can tell in the end
HEATHERS:
If she
H. MCNAMARA:
Had your shot
HEATHERS:
She would leave you to rot!
H. MCNAMARA:
‘Course if you don’t care
Fine! Go braid her hair
Maybe Sesame Street is on
HEATHERS:
Woah!
H. MCNAMARA:
Or forget that creep
H. DUKE:
And get in my jeep
H. CHANDLER:
Let’s go tear up someone’s lawn
HEATHERS:
Woah! Woah! Woah!
Honey, whatchu waitin’ for?
Welcome to my candy store
You just gotta prove
You’re not a pus*y anymore
And step into my candy store
H. CHANDLER:
You can join the team
H. DUKE; H. MCNAMARA:
Or you can b*tch and moan
H. CHANDLER:
You can live the dream
H. DUKE; H. MCNAMARA:
Or you can die alone
H. CHANDLER:
You can fly with eagles
HEATHERS:
Or if you prefer
H. CHANDLER:
Keep on testing me
H. DUKE; H. MCNAMARA:
And end up like her!
MARTHA:
Veronica, look!
Ram invited me to his homecoming party.
This proves he’s been thinking about me.
VERONICA:
Color me stoked.
MARTHA:
I’m so happy!
HEATHERS:
Woah!
H. DUKE:
Honey, whachu waiting fo—
H. CHANDLER:
SHUT UP HEATHER!
Step into my can-dy-- store Oooh woah!
H. CHANDLER; H. DUKE; H. MCNAMARA:
Whoa- Time for you to prove
You’re not a lame ass anymore- Then step into my candy store!
HEATHERS:
It’s my candy store,
It’s my candy-
It’s my candy store,
It’s my candy-
It’s my candy store,
It's my candy store!