​sh*t song about sh*t feelings. lyrics

[Intro]
Such a freak
Ken, I f*cking hate you

[Verse]
I'm hurt but I don't wanna heal, when I wanted you, all you wanted was him
I'm f*cked, I'm stuck on her still, wish you would say that you wanted me still
I'm hurt, won't heal, want you but you want him
I'm f*cked, I'm still stuck on you, what the f*ck do I do?
I'm over it, nothing matters at all, I got my back to the wall
How f*cking heavy this boulder get? Tired of holdin' it
I think I'm ready to fall, not in love again, I won't do that again
No, not in love again, I won't do that, cause last time I did, left a knife in my back
She was sh*t, I got treated like crap, I was in bed on my phone tryna call you
But I didn't know you were sittin' on laps
I should of known from the way that I found you
That you were a mess and we nevеr could last
I go to sleep kinda p*ssed, knowing I'll wake up still stuck in a cycle
Acting likе I give a sh*t, so nobody know I don't care at all about how life go
How f*cking worse could it get? I was broken before, I'll be broken again
I'm f*cking stuck in a pit, but you'll never know cause I never vent at all
I never talk and I never will, cause all of this talk don't make me heal
I wanna stop, I don't wanna live, ain't nothing in life worth what I feel
Wish I ain't exist, I wish I was never conceived
If wishes were real at all then I woulda died when I turned 18