Doof’s Lament lyrics

by

Lin-Manuel Miranda


[DOOFENSHMIRTZ]
How does a misfit, misanthrope, son of a viking in Gimmelshtump
Dropped without a thought and brought up by ocelots
In the Drusselstein woods where the nights were oh so chillin’
Grow up to be a budding evil villain?
For ten dollars, I found an offer on a website and I proctored it
After getting mocked a bit, I bought my own doctorate
A golden land of dreams is where I knew that I should head
But I wound up in America instead
Got married, had a daughter, and I turned my life around, man
While my brother was elected mayor of this town, man
Now I’m divorced, whilе of course, he gets thе fame
And nobody knows my name

[NORM]
What is your name, sir?

[DOOFENSHMIRTZ]
Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz
My name is Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz
And I’m someone whom success averts
But just you wait, just you wait
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