Scorekeeper lyrics

[Verse 1]
I say I'm angry at myself
But I'm not sure that it helps you
In a dream I leave without saying goodbye
I am walking down the street alone
I wanna call him, then I freeze
I can't fathom another lie

[Verse 2]
It takes all my strength and will
To suppress these feelings all the time
So I shut off without a reason
To disengage, to reply
And then I beg myself to write it down
I don't need to prove 'nothin
I just need to get some of it out

[Chorus]
You knock on the door as a friend
My heart drops again
It feels like the room is shaking
I hide myself in a closet (I hide myself in a closet)
Just as scared as I am excited (Just as scared as I am excited)
Far more unsure
Than I've ever been
[Verse 3]
The further that I get in time
The more I believe I crossed the line (I crossed the line!)
You played a game with my mind
I wanted comfort like a child
Don't listen to me right now
So I can crawl out of this house

[Chorus]
You knock on the door as a friend
My heart drops again
It feels like the room is shaking
So I hide myself in a closet (I hide myself in a closet)
Just as scared as I am excited (Just as scared as I am excited)
I'll never lose him
If I pretend there's more
And it seems like the older I get
The more I become lenient
To this kind of behavior
I should never allow

[Post-Chorus]
But I'm not the scorekeeper
I just observe and learn
The warm blanket of anger
Covering all my fears
And I'll never let you down
I just need to drown him out
[Outro]
You wake me from my nightmares
Kissing away my tears