Simon lyrics
by Kool Keith
[Intro]
Yeah
Simon
I'm talkin' to you
This motherf*cker right here's for you
You got a lot of motherf*ckers comin' up on your show
And you tryna act like you motherf*ckin' judgin' every-f*ckin'-body
You ain't no-motherf*ckin'-body
[Verse]
f*ck American Idol, Simon, and his whack ass!
He can kiss the bottom of my foot and Paula can kiss my black ass
That show is for no pro, it's for a jackass
I p*ss on the ratings with a scuba diving tank with a German mask
The type of guy to defecate on jazz and bluegrass
Paint your face black, I guarantee all your assets, you'll leave with a blue ass
I'm that insurance guy that come with a tow truck, when your Maybach crash
These microphone n*ggas with big budgets is trash
Lassie-type n*ggas who don't bark back, they sneak-bite n*ggas
I'm ready for combat with poison down on the floor
You come up and test my sh*t like a rat
You pick a spot where you think you f*ckin hot
And watch me wipe my ass wit'cha baseball cap
I p*ss on your pants from the Gap
Your b*tch be f*cked up with Noxzema on her face with a headwrap
That sh*t your spit to everybody is head-crap
f*ck with Franklin Fred rap
You're just a man sneakin' back through a crack in rap
Flip your f*ckin toupee like a flapjack
You a sap in rap, that b*tch ain't got no fat ass in the magazines
That's mad-flat, she's just hyped up with a corny basketball-ass
That's mad-fat, in fact, she's a DVD homeless cat
Somebody I wouldn't want to dance to my track
Or put on some pants to my track
How you gon' stand there? You better be in a b-boy stance to my track
Everybody flippin' over a bullsh*t thong in your buttcrack
Now I'm hyper-toned up with a Corona
She ain't got gas in her ass to get from Corona
She's a roommate livin' on a budget from a loaner
A grown-ass woman flyin' back and forth to a yellow Toyota
f*ckin' with some cornbread ten-karat-gold-chain n*gga that look like Yoda
How the f*ck you gon' represent plastic surgery?
Yo' ass movin in with the club promoter
How long you gon' do that sh*t 'til you get older and bolder?
With strength from the butt needles
I'm that n*gga that's low-key in the spotlight
Watchin' your peoples, on some real-life
I'm surreal trife, watchin' these girls out in Vegas
Askin' Carmelo Anthony to turn on they Con Edison lights
[Outro]
Yeah! We rule
Dr. Dooom is in the f*ckin' room
Now you take that motherf*cker personal
I want y'all to cover your ass
I'mma be there! Motherf*cker, I'mma be there
Right in the back of your f*ckin' dandruff, right on top of your hair
Yeah!