Chef Pee Pee vs. Teruteru Hanamura - RAP BATTLE! lyrics

[Intro: Announcer]
Loco Rap Battles
Chef Pee Pee
Versus
Teruteru Hanamura

[Verse 1: Teruteru Hanamura (SIR Rap Battles)]
If you're prepared to light a flame
You better show me your best
Why you can call me Teruteru or the Ultimate Chef!
Before they went and told me more
I thought I'd just make you a beef stew!
But with a name like yours
I know exactly how to treat you
A nice home cooked meal
Haven't had that in a while?
I heard you had to find yourself another dad as a child!
My upbringing was pretty rash
But I would crumble to pieces
If my father only came back into my life for some pizza!
And so to tell you the truth
I think it's better to stop it
My words could never pierce through you
Like what you went through in college!
Like Nintendo proposed your channel
I'm suggesting we cease this
And I'll stop and bring you some wine
It's probably needed
[Verse 2: Chef Pee Pee (Danii)]
Why are you calling me?
There's other jobs I wanted to do
No, Junior
I will NOT play Danganronpa with you!
Was that the door?
I'll go and have me a look
How the f*ck did you get here if you can't even cook?!
f*ck Chef Pee Pee
I'm Chef Pimpin'
I deck b*tches!
But I could never match the way you disrespect women!
To reach my level you won't even be worthy
I wouldn't trust you forty seconds alone prepping the turkey!
You know, an awkward f*cking vibe
Is all you're bringing to the table
Can't secure yourself a lady
So surround yourself with ladles!
Just don't come and make it my problem
When you're stalking for digits
I've done my best to avoid 'em since the damn lottery ticket!

[Verse 3: Teruteru Hanamura (SIR Rap Battles)]
Oh now I can't cook?
C'mon, your show defines what tasteless is
Your main course is making fun of disabled kids!
Puppeted to spread racist remarks like it's a hobby
At least it means you're used to having stuff stuck up your body
Yeah I'm a little in over my head with women
But sixty thousand dollars is a bit over the limit, Logan!
So leave the kitchen or I'll waste you too
The only thing you ever killed at all was GameCubeDube!
[Verse 4: Chef Pee Pee (Danii)]
You say I'm nothing but a puppet but uhhh
Chef Pee Pee doesn't care!
I still have more soul than any game made with that f*cking bear!
I keep a burner on my hip for any foe who gets close
You carry heat on you too and it's a portable stove!
Man you got played by Nagito and then got dropped to your end
Dude we all watched it happen
Like that sh*t was Charleyyy and Friends!
Next time your momma hits the ground 'cause of her awful disease
Will you be there to help her out?
Nah, it's just me!