Monika vs Quagmire lyrics

[Intro: Monika]
EPIC RAP BATLES OF HISTORY!
GLENN QUAGMIRE
VS
Yours Truly... *Chuckles*
BEGIN!

[Verse 1: Glenn Quagmire]
Mascot horror took a turn after Slender Man, woof
You told young girls to kill themselves and then said it was a goof
If your pink-haired friend needs a new daddy then she's lucky
Now it's time I find out why they call her Nutsucky
(ay) You like trapping people in a room for infinity
(ay) At least I let the girls go eventually, Just Giggity
(ay) Your game might have been free but I still felt ripped
I heard your club had Yuri, but none of the girls stripped!

[Verse 2: Monika]
Who the f*ck starts a batle like that? On sight
Your giggity bits are hit-or-miss, all right
As the club president, I mic-control the prompts (Heheh)
I spit with such flow, no wondеr Quagmire's swamped
(ay) Tom Sellеck called, (ay) he wants his shirt back
So get it off your sexy chest and tell me you can flirt back
(ay) And I'll keep it true
It seems today, that all you see, is a future where I can be with you
[Verse 3: Glenn Quagmire]
I tried to delete your file, but I must have been in stupor
'Cause I got distracted by other folders in my computer
Look, I may be kinda sleazy, but your vibe is just the worst
But I'll be knocking on your door like "18? You're first."
DDLC's a gross, exploitative disgrace
You bunch of hopeless, lowercase poets; Aliza Grace (oh!)
Turn mental illness into punchlines, edgy shocks, and gore
And I could forgive all of it if you weren't such a bore

[Verse 4: Monika]
In every other cutaway, you got the charges piling
Quahog, Rhode Island? More like Flight crash, Lone Island
And I heard you flew the plane, this pervert can't be helped
So why don’t you erotically asphyxiate yourself? (ohh)
Don't go mano-a-Monika, your doki-doki will go offline
You have more STI's than inches in your jawline
Now this sexual offender is the one getting abducted
Don't need to go into the code, this -phile came corrupted

[Outro: Monika]
WHO WON?
WHO'S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE
EPIC RAP... BATLES- oops… *Nervous laughter* OF HISTORY