Tuong Lu Kim vs Apu Nahasapeemapetilon lyrics
by Epic Rap Batles of History
[Intro]
EPIC RAP BATLES OF HISTORY!
TUONG LU KIM
VS
APU NAHASAPEEMAPETILON
BEGIN!
[Verse 1: Tuong Lu Kim]
Hello, City Wok, take your order please?
Uh huh, yeah, I can lay some fire on the beat
I'm loved by everybody, my fame is sky high
Got both a restaurant and airline 'cause I so fly
The Mongolians can't take me and you can't with your rappin'
Especially when I can't understand your f*cking accent
So come and get some Gandhi, but my City Wok stand pretty tall
You can try to break me down but you will never break my city wall!
[Verse 2: Apu Nahasapeemapetilon]
I'm not interested in trying Noodle Palace, I'm suspecting that the food is fishy
With more grime and gеrms than what is in my Squishee
If you want to face the Longhorn then lеt's do this in a Kwik-E
Cause Nahasapeemapetilon spits sickly
I can see through the walls that you're building
You got scared half to death by two disabled children
You talk about freshness? But what a disgrace
Your kitchen's so filthy even rats want to escape
You should reconsider your angry approach with your life
'Cause you'll be sent above with Wings and I don't mean your wife
I treat mine like a queen, but you let a boxer smack her
Put your ass right on my shelf, I need to restock on crackers
[Verse 3: Tuong Lu Kim and Dr. William Janus]
You're moving your lips, but I can't hear a noise
The critics went so hard for your throat you lost your voice
Now they've gone seven seasons without giving you a new one?
The accent didn't matter, the Problem was you, son!
Hey, did someone order a pizza? Yeah, I did, one second
Billy's in a spooky mansion trying to do some inspectin'
YOU CAN'T RUN FOREVER- wait! Where you going, friend?
YOU'LL NEVER TURN ME IN, BUDDY, I WILL MAKE SURE YOU'RE DEAD
You talk of hope and pride like you're the beacon of light
But your stale routines are like leftovers from last night
Your VA may be Japanese since he always yells
"OH I'M SO SORRY FOR THE VOICE, I'M GONNA KILL MYSELF"
Since Simpson don't want you, go ahead and holler
I fly you back to India for 6000 dollars!
So go get yourself shot for the ninth f*cking time
Cause your rapping is worse than the voice of me wife
[Verse 4: Apu Nahasapeemapetilon]
Ah, you think yourself a warrior, a king of the street
But all I see's a businessman too scared to compete
Because you saw the City Sushi guy and decided to kill him
You have more child workers than I do actual children
You'll never get anywhere spitting all that racket
Set some Looney Tunes traps but you still got your ass kicked
So make like the Mongolians and just start retreating
Thank you, but come again if you want another beating
[Verse 5: Washee Washee?!]
ENOUGH OF THE BING BONG, I'LL KICK YOU IN THE DING DONG
I'M WASHEE WASHEE AND I'VE COME HERE TO SING SONG
I LEAVE THIS WHITEWASHED b*tch LITERALLY WASHED
YOU'RE NOT EVEN MADE IN CHINA BUT YOU STILL THE CHEAPER COST
AND I GAVE MANJULA HAPPY ENDING, I WOO HER WITH MY WU
WE DON'T NEED YOU, THEY FLUSHED YOU DOWN LIKE A POO
CHECK THE SIGN, 'CAUSE I'M NUMBER ONE, WHILE YOU TWO POOR
NOW GET OUT MY BATLE, YOU BOTH BANNED FROM MY STORE!!! (bing bong)
[Outro]
WHO WON?
WHO'S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE!
EPIC!
HIYA! HIYA! HIYA!
RAP BATLES OF HISTORY!