SANTA TRIED TO f*ck ME! lyrics

[Verse 1: DigBar]
It's about that time of year, it's almost Christmas though
Remember when that n*gga tried to kiss me by the mistletoe
Man, I still believe in Santa, bro, I know he's real
Christmas Eve, I always keep my milk and my cookies field
But this sh*t, this ain't yo' ordinary Christmas song
We gotta tell y'all like some'n important, we won't keep you long
I'm in this b*tch with Mr. Luck, man I know he feelin' lucky
Long story short, that n*gga Santa tried to f*ck me
Last Christmas Eve, I walked down the stairs and I was singin' Jingle Bells
One hour 'til midnight, I seen Santa, he wasn't seemin' well
I was spyin' on him, tryna check if I got gifts
Man, that n*gga Santa empty-handed, he did not have sh*t
So I was p*ssed, I'm like "Santa, whеre the f*ck is my gifts?"
He just lookеd me in my eyes and then he held up his fist
I'm like what? Does this n*gga think he Thanos?
Then he said that he gon' play up in my booty just like it's some Play-Doh
I was hella shook, I said "Man, I thought that you was Santa"
He said "f*ck that Christmas sh*t, you lookin' good in them pajamas"
I was heartbroken, Santa, man, I can't believe this sh*t
He said meet him at the workshop for some ol' Saint di*k
So I did, I ain't gon' be the n*gga that's known for lettin' Santa down
I'ma go give Santa what he want while y'all all stand around
I just pulled up to the workshop, n*gga we just landed down
When I walked up to the door, that n*gga Santa pants was down
[Interlude: DigBar & Mr. Luck]
Damn Santa
sh*t, you gon' make me a ho ho ho *chuckle*
Ah, sh*t
No no no
Ho ho ho (No no no, sh*t)
Heh heh heh (Wait)
Come here lil' boy, heh heh heh
Aahh, aahh, aahh, aahh, aahh, ah (*laughing*)
Wait, wait, wait, please, please (*laughing*)
Please, please don't do this
Uhhh

[Refrain]
Ho ho, ho ho ho, ho ho ho
Ho ho ho ho, ho ho ho ho, ho ho
Hee ho no no, no no no no, no no, I go
Ho ho ho ho, ho ho ho ho, ho ho ho ho

[Verse 2: Mr. Luck]
So I'm in Santa's workshop
Thinkin' this the worst stop
And then I got my first shock
When Santa dropped his fur top (Huh?)
Then he stripped his whole suit
And he say "You look hella cute" (What?)
He wanna play my c*ck like a flute
I say "f*ck this sh*t", then I scoot (Oh)
But it's too late (What?), he's at the gate
He can't wait, there's no debate
Man, I thought Santa was straight
Man, Santa want my milk and cookies
Treat my balls like they some goodies (Oh)
I thought Santa only did good deeds
There's only one way I could appease
What is it? (Damn)
Santa wanna f*ck me (Huh?)
I don't know what struck me
Santa wanna plug me
Treat me like a dummy, sh*t (What?)
I don't know what to do
Santa like "I wanna f*ck you" (Huh?)
Yo' ass runnin' be a f*ckin' good view (Ah)
Damn man, ha, I almost made it through (What?)
Then he got me
This cannot be (Woah), I'm like "Not me"
He say that I'm a hottie
I want my mommy, I'm like "f*ck"
I'm like "f*ck, f*ck, f*ck"
[Break]
Heh heh heh
Ho ho ho
You my ho ho ho

[Refrain]
I go ho ho, ho ho ho, ho ho ho
Ho ho ho ho, ho ho ho ho, ho ho
Hee ho no no, no no no no, no no, I go
Ho ho ho ho, ho ho ho ho, ho ho ho ho

[Verse 3: Mr. Luck]
He ripped my shirt off with his paws
Look in the corner, I'm in awe (What?)
Who's that watchin'? It's Ms. Claus
Hangin' her pants, she go yaw (What?)
Then I rise up like a phoenix
Turn to Santa, rip off his p*nis (Huh?)
Once I seen it in my hand, I leave
sh*t dirty (God), need a hygienist
Man, sh*t, this scene is gross
I killed Santa, I'm an extremist (Huh?)
And Ms. Claus sees it
Throws the di*k, but she missed
Santa rise up, run between his legs
For the cleanest escape, he shouts
"I'll do revenge, and I mean this" (Huh?)
Then I run to his sleigh, this sh*t a crazy day
And I ride that sh*t far far away (away, away)