Im not alright lyrics

I’m not alright
I really wanna die
Say goodbye
Taking my own life
Getting high
Throat is getting dry
Outta time
My demons won’t comply
And I don’t know
If I’ll get closure
I’d only hope
I’m fine when it’s over
Nobody knows
How I feel when I’m sober
Bout to explode
Cause I’m losing my composure
I tried to get help but no one knows
They don’t see the hints that I try to show
Distract myself again, don’t know how to cope
I’ve been losing friends, I feel like a ghost
I can feel the hate taking over
Get tf out the way thought I told her
I’m aBout to grab the gun from holster
PTSD go insane like a soldier
I can’t f*cking stand mysеlf I’m a piece of sh*t I desеrve to go to hell
I should really get some help but my f*cked up mind doesn’t know who to tell
Every single day I contemplate
I just wanna take my life away