Okay with this lyrics

My favorite backpack has a hole in it now
I think I'll try to patch it
But I'm worried I'll f*ck it up
Trying to learn how to stop missing people
'Cause they're never the same in my head
I'm always let down

And if they don't f*ck it up
I'll f*ck it up myself

But I don't wanna be a martyr anymore
I just wanna be normal
But you look at me and see what you see in anybody else
It's not that I hate myself
It just seems like everyone else does
This town's decided that I'm too queer to be loved

Maybe I should give it a rest
Spend a year or two in bed
Hoping I wake up
I'll be what everyone wants
It's like I'm a funhouse mirror
But I can still f*ck you up
Shatter me
You'll get 7 years of bad luck
I don't wanna change
But everyone else stays the same
I don't wanna
But I have to anyway