Coin-Operated Goi lyrics

[Chorus]
Coin-operated goi
Scary but it's true
He is not a Jew
He won't touch a Horah
Won't light the Menorah
And it's not a lie
He ain't even circ*mcised
Oi! Coin-operated goi

[Verse 1]
I'm not so sure
That he's kosher
Despite what is in the brochure
Everything he eats is wrapped in ham
Plus he tried to pork me in the can
I should go and ask my rabbi
If it's a sin if he and I
Do it through a small hole in the sheet
Just big enough to slip my kosher meat
Groin-Masticated Joy
Oh, boy!

[Chorus]
Coin-operated goi
Can't hang with the Mohels
He ain't got the curls
I say we convert him
It ain't gonna hurt him
Well maybe down below
He will have to undergo
A groin-operation ploy
[Verse 2]
His bris we'll preform
To make his schmuck deformed
The Mohel gets a dollar
If he makes him holler
To make his c*ck more slim
We'll chop off his foreskin
Give it to the kvater
He'll bless it for seder
We'll nosh on it later

[Bridge]
Oh I want a
I want a
I want a
I want a
I want a
I want a
I want a
I want a
I want a
For Rosh Hashanah
A coin operated goi, oh boy!

[Chorus]
Coin-operated goi
Scary but it's true
He was not a Jew
But honestly no schitzvah
He had a bar mitzvah
But now he's kosher too
He's just like me and you
A Coin-operated Jew, aha!