(intro and stage patter) lyrics

by

GG Allin


Club announcer's words are in boldface; GG's words are in regular text

--------------------------------

Here's your lord and master, after a five-year absence. The king! Mr. GG Allin, Public Animal Number One, f*ckin' sleazebag!

[random shouting from the audience as GG and the band take the stage]

You're all a bunch of f*ckin' queers!

[shouting from audience gets louder]

You want me, motherf*ckers? You got my c*ck tonight!

I can't say anything is gonna happen here tonight, because I don't f*ckin' know. I've just been playing with these guys for two days. Doing a lot of drinking, a lot of drugs, a lot of gettin' f*cked up. So we might be good and we might really suck, but we don't really give a f*ck, because we've got your money anyway. As long as I don't take a sh*t onstage, these motherf*ckers are gonna pay me. So I might just stand up here and beat off all night.

Cuz I don't really give a f*ck if you... really, I'm serious. You could all leave right now, I don't give a f*ck. But I hope to get... I hope... I got a guy over here that wants to get a blowjob tonight, and I've already told him I'd suck his c*ck onstage. I did it in Philadelphia on New Year's Eve. And I'll really do it. I'll suck this guy's c*ck onstage.

But, but, there's one stipulation... if I don't f*ckin' fall and kill myself before we do the set. Which I might do, because this guy's buying me drinks. Take this f*ckin' stand out of here. Take this stand, because I need the money.

Wait, wait, wait. Okay. And the next thing we gotta do, is we got some girls that are comin' up, and sh*t. Right? And if any other girls want to come up to the front, just come up. I'll tell you why, because we're gonna need you.

We're sick of beating off, although we like it. And we'll buy any girl... at the end of the night, any girl that wants to sell me... if she's been wearing her panties for two days, and they really smell, I'll give you five bucks. If you're ugly, we'll give you five bucks. If you're good-looking, we'll give you ten. If you're beautiful, we'll f*ck you for 25!

But we ain't gonna make that much money, so we can only go as high as 25. I mean... but if you buy me a drink, you got my di*k, right? It's small, right? But it will stick in, it will get hard, it will spit. It's a real small one. You're probably... girls are saying, "my 12-year-old brother's got a bigger di*k than him". But I don't give a f*ck! Cuz it's the only one I've got, and I gotta use it! So what am I gonna do? I'm ugly, right? I'm an ugly f*ckin' sc*mfuc. Without this, I'm even uglier.
It don't matter how ugly I am. I can still beat off, and I can still suck your panties, so think about it. Five bucks if you're a f*ckin' whale. I see a lot of ugly girls tonight. I'll give you five bucks. I mean, you can make a... who's gonna give you five bucks for those piece of sh*t, huh? And if you're nice looking, you'll make ten.

But there's only, there's only... really, there's only really one thing here, right? I know I haven't played here for five years, so I'm bullsh*ttin' ya. And I know you wanted to hear some music. Well, we can't play music. So, we're just here to tell you one thing: I am f*ckin' God. I am f*ckin' God. You'll see a lot of other bands, a lot of other bullsh*t. But I am f*ckin' God. I'm the f*ckin'... I'm the f*ckin' c*nt of the Earth. And I'd take a sh*t tonight, but I don't think you people are worthy of my f*ckin' diarrhea.

And this is the Providence Afterbirth Supersc*m. And we don't really give a f*ck if we f*ck up.

And we've got my endorsement. Jim Beam is my endorsement.

If you don't want to pull your pants off, we'll cut 'em off. Keep an eye on 'em.

We are f*ckin' God!

I hope you paid a lot of money to f*ckin' get in here tonight, because we f*ckin' need the money! For drugs! And alcohol!

Don't you think it's great? You paid six bucks to hear a f*ckin' rambling idiot.
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