Linda Lovelace lyrics

Well, I've f*cked 'em all from Coast to Coast...
Well you can talk about your lovers and your back door pimps
You can talk about your hollywood Fags

If you want to know the best love in the world then I'm the best mother-f*cker alive
Jackie Onassis was a snuff queen for me before she ever got rich
And it would take a man a day and a half just to satisfy that b*tch

Why the Queen of England gave me the keys to the whole damn Country of France
And it only took me 15 minutes to get into her pants

Well, I've f*cked 'em all from Coast to Coast, cause honey, that's my bag

Fact, I'm the only guy in the world who can make Linda Lovelace Gag

Doot doot doot duh...

Now it ain't that my di*k's so goddamn big, it's just that I know how to use
I'll never let no nickle-dime whore ever get the chance to abuse it
They can suck it for hours and hours on end, but I'll still be in control
And I won't c*m 'til I wanna c*m, cause that's my jelly-roll

Now they're ain't no woman, no match for me, I've had 'em try to wear me down
I've f*cked them barmaids, and bankclerks, I even f*cked a circus clown
Teachers and Lawyers doctors and more, them fat women sure are a drag
I tell you I'm the only motherf*cker in the world that can make Linda Lovelace gag

Well, old Harry Reams fall apart at the seams when he saw me f*ck that whore
She sucked my di*k and swallowed my nuts, and I still hollered for more
She sucked my as*h*le, she sucked my toes, she's the suckinest b*tch alive
I made her call up two more c*nts, and friend that at no jive

She don't give me no sh*t about being no big time lover
Some movie star with a jag
Cause you ain't sh*t...
If you can't get Linda lovelace to gag

And don't talk about being no full-time lover, cause mister, that's my bag

I'm the only motherf*cker in the damn world that can make Linda Lovelace gag

Doot doot doot