Theme from Beyond the Valley of the Assf*ckers lyrics

[Spoken]
LURCH: I'm on my way to a punk rock show at the Clubhouse in Colorado Springs to see the Nobodys! Since B-Face left the Queers, they're my favorite band. I hope Lurch talks to me, he knows everything about everything. Hey, that's not the Nobodys! And that's not that nitwit Lurch! Hey, wait a minute! Where am I?! Everything went black! What the... Good God, no! Where am I??! AHHHHH!

JOE: Heh, don't worry kid. You're just beyond the valley...of the assf*ckers!

You're beyond the valley
You're beyond the valley
You're beyond the valley
You're beyond the valley
You're beyond the valley
You're beyond the valley
You're beyond the valley
You're beyond the valley

[Spoken]
JOE: Beyond the Valley of the Assf*ckers is a Quinn Martin production starring Efrem Zimbalist Jr., Lurch f*ckin' Nobody from Colorado Springs, Wimpy Rutherford from outer f*ckin' space, and [?] Joe f*ckin' Queer, motherf*cker. Beyond the Valley of the Assf*ckers: punk rock for the next millennium, faggot. What Black Flag, [?], and the Ramones begat, Mike Ness effectively killed with Rancid. December 31st, 12:59 p.m., 1999, motherf*cker. See kids? Punk rock for the next millennium! It's not about your little boyfriend with his little [?] mohawk, panhandling in his little $150 Doc Martens on Telegraph and acting like he's a punk rock f*ckin' know-it-all 'cause he saw Rancid driving down the f*ckin' street. f*ck that bullsh*t, man. And punk rock's not for that f*ckin'... those as*h*les in f*ckin' San Francisco, Maximum f*ckin' RocknRoll, telling everybody what's punk and what isn't, like those West Coast faggots would even know. All those pimply-faced fags are from Montana, anyway, and their f*ckin' ugly b*tches should f*ckin' shave their legs. Punk rock for the next millennium, see kids? You gotta get your sh*t together. It's like every other f*ckin' thing in this f*ckin' world. Punk rock for the next millennium: it's all about the money. Tell it to the motherf*ckers at MaximumRocknRoll, it's all about the money. It's all about the money when you're beyond the valley of the assf*ckers!

Assf*ckers, assf*ckers, assf*ckers, yeah!
Assf*ckers, assf*ckers, assf*ckers, yeah!
Assf*ckers, assf*ckers, assf*ckers!
You're all assf*ckers, assf*ckers, assf*ckers!
f*ckers, assf*ckers, assf*ckers, assf*ckers!
Punk rock assf*ckers, assf*ckers, assf*ckers!
Assf*ckers, assf*ckers, assf*ckers, yeah!
Assf*ckers, assf*ckers, punk rock assf*ckers!
Assf*ckers, assf*ckers, punk rock assf*ckers!
Assf*ckers, assf*ckers, assf*ckers!
Assf*ckers, assf*ckers, assf*ckers!
Burn the f*ckin' money, f*cker!
Assf*ckers, assf*ckers, assf*ckers, assf*ckers!
Assf*ckers, assf*ckers, assf*ckers!
Assf*ckers, assf*ckers, go, go for the money!
Assf*ckers, assf*ckers, punk rock assf*ckers!
Assf*ckers, assf*ckers, punk rock assf*ckers!
Assf*ckers, assf*ckers, assf*ckers!
Assf*ckers, assf*ckers, assf*ckers!
You assf*ckers, assf*ckers, assf*ckers!
Suck di*k for f*cking money, you little sellout faggot
f*ck you, you assf*cker
(You're beyond the valley)
(You're beyond the valley)
di*k sucker