Let’s Have a Wank For England (2010) lyrics

My dad told me a secret, back in 1966
Before every England World Cup game he wanked his hairy prick
And to this day he still maintains he helped them win the cup
He spunked into a football sock to save him mopping up

So this year before the warm up games I copied my old man
And we beat the Mexicans and fluked a win over Japan
So if we wank for luck, how can it hurt unless your c*ck is sore?
Take your helmet in your hand and think of Bobby Moore

Let’s go to South Africa and win the World Cup
And pray to baby Jebus Barry’s injury heals up
I’m gonna wank my veiny pipe until it spunks up
To help us win the cup for England

Let’s have a wank, Let’s have a wank
Let’s have a wank for England
It might bring us luck if you give your hand a f*ck
We’ll make it a success
And there’s nothing to lose except your mess


If our boys pull on the England shirt and give everything they can
Then I don’t care if John Terry’s c*ck’s out of control or Rooney likes f*cking nans
I wouldn’t care if Capello was a rapist or a nonce
If he brings the World Cup home he can do what the f*ck he wants
Now Rio is injured people don’t give us a prayer
But come on Lennon, get a cross in, Crouch will win it in the air
He’ll knock it down to Rooney who will tee up Stevie G
And as he scores I’ll strangle my sausage till it does a sexy wee

Let’s go to South Africa and win the World Cup
And if it goes to penalties hope we don’t f*ck it up
I’m gonna wank my stiffy off until it spunks up
To help us win the cup for England

Let’s have a wank, Let’s have a wank
Let’s have a wank for England
It might bring us luck if you wank and chuck your muck
We’ll make it a success
And there’s nothing to lose except your mess