Complicated lyrics

[Verse]
All this pain in my life, I need compensating
For all them laps on the yard but I'm not Jamaican
I sent burn down the toilet in the block for Clayton
Spent hours at the window conversating
Neighbour doing life, suicidal, contemplating
Last ten years, I've been a prisoner, my occupation
Every day I'm getting watched like an observation
Got me waiting on a date like a doctor's patient
Now I'm feeling like Stan how I adopt the patience
For the next seven years, bro, I've got probation
I've got a prison number looking like a combination
And now I'm stuck with this sh*t like some constipation
Lukе said he's not a snitch but I've got the statеment
I got nicked with three straps because I got complacent
I'm tryna tell you 'bout my life but it's complicated
I'm tryna put it all together like a compilation
I'm tryna turn my life around, I feel obligated
I watched my bruddas go to jail and then we alternated
Since then, I've been looking for alternatives
They keep adding to the case like it's adulterated
I've got an extra two years for an altercation
'Cause I seen him on a visit then we altercated
f*cked the roads, it's gassed up bro, it's overrated
I was calling 'em my bruddas but we're not related
We're meant to keep it in the streets but they cooperated
I watched people turn fake and then they congregated
I took bullets, went to sleep and then they operated
Claustrophobic, in a cell, I felt suffocated
Seen bodies, bro, they never got resuscitated
Solitary confined, I was segregated
S done a protest on the block, defecated
And I'm the voice of the trenches, I've been delegated
They wasn't doing what they said so they got relegated
I'm Nipsey Hussle with the rap because I'm dedicated
I'm tryna blow like a bomb that's been detonated
I'm tryna blow up and leave the scene decimated
'Cause when they give me extra time, I was devastated
I've got a girl, bro, imagine if she never waited
I just keep myself busy, self-educated
I was fifteen the last birthday I celebrated
I started rapping in a cell and then I elevated
I'm tryna rise to the top like I've levitated
I tried putting people on, bro, I've never hated
I even showed 'em how to do it, bro, I demonstrated
They was putting dirt on my name so we separated
I really got it out the mud like I excavated
And I can tell you 'bout them bullets, how they penetrated
Looking down the barrel, coulda died but he hesitated
Broke the handle on the shotty, had to Sellotape it
Remember when the doctor told me that I should be medicated
For all these built-up emotions that I've generated
I've tried everything, bro I've even meditated
And people ask me how I'm doing, I just say I'm good
Even when I know I'm not, just tell 'em I'm misunderstood
Haven't phoned my mum for two months although I know I should
I'm just working hard to get my family all out the hood
And free the lifers, when I left, I gave them a hug
Doesn't cost nothing to be loyal and show them love
And if you're playing with my name then you can catch a slug
I've been gone for years so for now, I'm just catching up
COVID-19 the only time that they was masking up
Got these mask and gloves