Wobblies From Space lyrics

Listen and I'll tell you a tale I've been told
Of a union organizer who knocked a starship cold
They met where the stars are scattered thin out on the galactic rim
And Starfleet command is sorry that they ever ran into him

Fold up your guns
Run while you can
Look out, here comes the union man

Now the ship was patrolling rim stars when she got a call for aid
And up come a local convoy in a hurried grim parade
Saying, "Captain we've caught a monster who's too much for us by far
So take him please and throw him in the heart of the nearest star"

Fold up your guns
Run while you can
Look out, here comes the union man

"Just why do you need a whole convoy?" the Captain wished to know
"Three ships to guard the other lest he grab it as we go."
Now the Captain was intrigued and he said, "stand by for scan,"
But all that showed on the viewing screen was a little old union man

Fold up your guns
Run while you can
Look out, here comes the union man
The Captain said, "I can take him," and he beamed the man aboard
The convoy turned and raced away crying "Thank the Lord!"
Then the Captain looked him over asking, "just what's going on
That they sent out half their trading fleet just to make sure you were gone?"

Fold up your guns
Run while you can
Look out, here comes the union man

The little old man just chuckled saying "Captain don't you know?
My job is organizing wherever I may go
And I can build me a union out of anything you got
And the folks who run that planet well they disliked that a lot"

Fold up your guns
Run while you can
Look out, here comes the union man

"I first organized the laborers, Then I unionized the clerks
Then I unionized the robots who staffed the atomic works
But when I organized the milk cows and led them out on strike
Well you can guess what official reaction to that was like"

Wha-ha-ha!

Fold up your guns
Run while you can
Look out, here comes the union man
"Amazing," said the Captain, "but you can't do that in here
My crew are loyal navy men and we've no cause to fear."
But he heard the old man saying as he walked out the door
"Captain, y'know, there have so been navy unions before"

Fold up your guns
Run while you can
Look out, here comes the union man

Well the Captain soon forgot him setting course for Starbase Five
For all he saw the union man he might never have been alive
Till a troubled ensign asked him "is it true sir what they say?
That we've got high hazard duty without high hazard pay?"

Fold up your guns
Run while you can
Look out, here comes the union man

Well the Captain couldn't answer except to say "its true
Starfleet could pay you better but theres not much I can do."
But when he woke up next morning he found out what morale was like
For the bridge was filled with pickets and the whole crew was on strike

Fold up your guns
Run while you can
Look out, here comes the union man
Then the union man walked up and said "I'm sorry to trouble you
But your ship is now a job shop of the I double-W.
We've sent our demands to Starfleet command and they said they'd grant us none
So we're just gonna keep on sailing until this strike is won."

Fold up your guns
Run while you can
Look out, here comes the union man

"Now further we've decided to run this co-op style
Giving everyone experience at each other's job awhile
We like you too much to dump you at the first starbase we see
But we voted you to the galley and this week's command to me."

Fold up your guns
Run while you can
Look out, here comes the union man

So somewhere down in the galley you'll find poor Captain Kirk
Scrubbing away on dishes swearing it'll never work
And Spock as he dries those dishes says, "It might succeed I fear
And please, Sir, while you're washing don't splash water in my ear."

Fold up your guns
Run while you can
Look out, here comes the union man