Peter Woodc*ck’s di*k Beaters lyrics

It was the night before Thanksgiving
My bar was a f*cking high school reunion
So I decided to black the f*ck out

Watching you and your bros chug Yuengling playing the same 3 Slayer songs
I asked, "If I stomp your flag will you really stomp my ass?
'Cause you don't look like you can even do a push up"
Those f*cks piled onto me
I crawled up and started biting di*ks
Naturally they had me arrested

I was in a holding cell with Clark the Shark
He said, "You're too pretty for prison, act nuts and get committed"
I told them I was chewing c*cks to regenerate my blood
That was turning to dust
They sent me to Oakridgе
The therapy was eating acid for brеakfast while strapped to Peter Woodc*ck
Then for arts and crafts he gave me a stick and poke
With the same di*k beaters he used to strangle children