Field Day for the Sundays lyrics

I want to be a field day for the Sundays so they can f*ck up my life
Embarrass my wife, and leave a bad taste
That striped toothpaste can't remove on Monday mornings

I want to be a target for the dailies so they can show
Pictures of me with a nude on page three, so lacking in taste
Touched up near the waist, looking as limp as Monday morning
Touched up near the waist, looking as limp as Monday morning