They people the town with dominoes - half price after dark
It's a half masked, two-faced place to go
Good thing the world's not flat - i'd be backing away from there
The second hand jacket from the fire brigade tries to not look drenched
While the damp umbrella in the corner hides a humble fifty pence
You would have to hold us back
Rod and alcohol combine, a glass of gin and "tonight's the night"
A sobering thought springs to my mind.....so I get them in
There's the anecdote about an argument with the singer from jellyfish
Made a secretive call to some friends of mine for a gift of twenty quid
Just enough to get us pished.....almost
Another drunk pub quiz compare, another drink, just to make it fair
I see it's almost afternoon.....so i get them in
Turn another page past the telly guide and the p*ssed cartoonist's strip
Take a telephone trip to the lonely hearts' armchair party night
Or explorers can buy a wife from bangkok
One day everything turns out right, the next is the end of that era
But i bottle up and keep it inside, i'm in shipshape
Rod and alcohol combine, a glass of wine and "tonight's the night"
A sobering thought springs to my mind.....so I get them in