Catalyst lyrics

Summer heat, burnt leaves, a taste of bittersweet
A wood beam, someone lays underneath
Soon under earth too
Everyone has been pierced with a spear of blue, oh at such a magnitude
Death isn't angry, he is kind, sweet and patient,
he collects his gifts from God, they are madly in love, oh but can never touch
They yearn, but an eternal devotion is no longer enough
They are the earth and the moon, always watching one another, yet so far
They pass their love to each other from afar, they ask for it to be carried by stars

I walk down the aisle, holding flowers which i now rest their necks on the podium
A slow stream of tears collect in the lake of my mouth, a salty solution
I'm cocooned in my black dress, hands covered by sleeves
I'm holding in an emotional cancer, no one would even think to believe
I stand in front of a crowd of the faceless to declare the loss of a heartbeat
I stare down at my feet, the casket is closed, so who could it be?

I promise i'm a good person
But, im such a liar
I’d kill in cold blood, turn around and play a warm innocents
I am guilty, so corrupt and an endangered species
A thin line between good and bad,
I have been walking, i have been jump-roping for years and now i have no clue where I stand
I can jump so high,
but, i can never land
Im dead to you, im dead to me
I'm guilty, so where do I plead?
Mortality sinks into their faces, they go pale
When they see the body
When we removed the black veil
It was covering the face, we had nothing else
I analyze everyone's states, no one seems to be going through hell
All composed and well
They don't care
Only then, only then, is when i realize that i'm sinking in regret
What i have done is permanent, unlike this scene that is currently playing
They’ll go home, go to bed, wake up as if i never left
At least the entire family is back in one room again
Its been years, and it saddens me that someone had to leave before anyone came back


Please tell me a story
Where i'm not here, i don't like this reality that has been given to me
I'm tired of me
As dull as can be, i tried to bore my killer out of me
But it played the waiting game
It waited, prayed and stayed
I'm a moth, so pale, dull and transparent
Attracted to what kills it
My killer was a magnet
The sweetness was the poisons aftertaste
Once i had realized it,
it was too late,
I have never had freedom but i have always had a fixed fate
I stare down at the body
I stare down at my feet, the casket is open, who would've known that it was me?
I just wanted to be happy
I want to be happy
I want my family to be happy