Keanu: George Michael Is Badass lyrics

Man, f*ck! Let's get some tunes goin' in this motherf*cker.
- Something, man.
- Tunes, man, yeah.

-f*ck, yeah. Let's see what we got here. I know you got some killer sh*t.

- Actually, no, we...

[FREEDOM '90 starts playing]


What? Yo. Yo, Shark Tank, my n*gga. Um... What the f*ck is this?

What the f*ck is this?


Oh... sh*t, n*ggas! This my sh*t right here!

This your sh*t? This sh*t sound kinda white.

CLARENCE
White? White?

- Yeah.

CLARENCE
n*ggas, this is George Michael, right here. All right? This one of the greatest recording artists of all time, man. This the real OG up in here.

So, he black, then?

CLARENCE
You know, he light-skinned. And then, he used to roll with this n*gga, Ridgeley.

Yeah.

CLARENCE
And then, George Michael was trying to do that solo thing, right?
And then, wham! Then nobody never see Ridgeley ever again.

He killed the motherf*cker?

CLARENCE
Nobody ever seen him again.

sh*t.

I'll f*ck with that n*gga.

I'll f*ck with him.
- Hey, hey, y'all.
- If he start that sh*t.

CLARENCE
Wait till y'all hear this next track, though, dirt.

[FATHER FIGURE plays, Clarence sings along]

Yo, that chorus do kick in nice, though.

CLARENCE
It does, don't it? Yeah, yeah. I mean, y'all hear the father figure part, right? Because, my man right here, he didn't have his own positive male role model in his life.
So...

Damn!

Yo, I never knew my daddy.
- Really?
- No.

[They listen to the end of the song]

Man, George Michael the sh*t, man!

CLARENCE
Right, dawg?

- Right on, man. Love that man.

[Now, it's ONE MORE TRY]
- So, Allentown...
- What? n*gga, f*ck, what? n*gga.
Tell me about it, man. Was it crazy?
Surely should have been.
Was it...

CLARENCE
Hells bells, hold on to your shells, n*gga. sh*t was crazy, sh*t was crazy. We was just dodging bullets on a everyday basis. You know, just for survival. But, you know, the thing about me and Techtonic,
is our communication skills. That's the backbone of our teamwork. You feel me?
- Yeah.
I get that.
All right.
- You know what?
- Mmm.

[Shows scar in his shoulder]
I never told y'all n*ggas how I got this. A kid stabbed me
'cause I stole his Ring Pop.

CLARENCE
That's awful, man. How old were you?

Twenty-three.

CLARENCE
Oh. Okay. Well... Yeah, thank you for sharing, though.

That felt good.

I got one, too. Check it out.

Okay, yeah. Let's see that.

[Bullet scars in his side]

Buckshot. Holding up a liquor store.
Oh, man.

CLARENCE
And then he shot you, man. That's crazy.

Nah, actually, it made the news, and when I got back to my grandmamma house, she shot me.

Okay, you know, you need to spend a little less time with your family.

I'm gonna advise that.
- Hell, yeah.
- So, what you got?

CLARENCE
Me? Oh, okay, let me, um...

- Yeah, yeah.
Come on, man. You got a bunch of sh*t, man.
- Here it is.
- You ain't gotta be modest.

CLARENCE
[Shows appendictomy scar in his belly]
A damn-ass street fight. Appendix. Blam...

Your appendix?

CLARENCE
They took it out of my body.

- What?

CLARENCE
Mmm-hmm. Mmm-hmm. Y'all don't even want to hear about what went down with my wisdom teeth.
- sh*t.
- Damn.