American Problems lyrics

[John Hanc*ck]
The President recognizes Mr. Adams from Massachusetts.

[John Adams]
Gentlemen. I'm going to keep this very short and very simple, ok. So listen up bozos.

[John Hanc*ck]
Mr. Adams, you cannot speak like tha-

[John Adams]
Shut the f*ck up. I was not talking to you at all. Shut your trap. Anyways, we have an opportunity unlike anything the world has ever seen before. We have the opportunity to create a new nation. Not an empire, but a republic, and a republic of laws. It has come to us to decide how we set this nation up. And I have some good plans. For starters, wе're going to back up the elеctoral college system, ok. Because I said so, it's a good plan ok, OK!?

[Thomas Jefferson]
Mr. Adams, the way you're talking is very concerning, and not at all helpful to the case, and secondly, the electoral college system is flawed. Why would we support such a thing?

[John Adams]
Ah Mr. Jefferson. Nice of you to show up for once. Well, the electoral college system will help people who don't really want to stay connected with politics. They have better things to do so, we need people to be focused on politics, and the electoral college system, it's just so right.

[Thomas Jefferson]
Mr. Adams. I do not think you understand that the electoral college will not let people vote for who they choose to vote for. The electors do that. So if someone casts their vote for a specific candidate and the electors didn't like that candidate, they could choose someone different. So, you're not really helping the case here.

[John Adams]
Mr. Jefferson. You're simply too f*cking stupid to understand how important the electoral college is for our country.

[John Hanc*ck]
Mr. Adams, that language will not be tolerated in here!
[John Adams]
NO! NO! YOU SHUT THE f*ck UP! I WAS NOT TALKING TO YOU! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT'S BEST FOR OUR COUNTRY! YOU WILL NOT RULE OVER US! SHUT UP!

[Thomas Jefferson]
This outburst of anger shows that you're clearly not capable of making the right decisions for our country.

[John Adams]
OH AND YOU THINK YOU CAN!?

[Thomas Jefferson]
As a matter of fact I know I can. I've been doing it for years, unlike you. You've spent the majority of your time over in France, and Denmark, and the Netherlands, and the UK, being scared sh*tting your pants while your family was getting f*cked by me.

[John Adams]
What did you just say? What did you do to my family!? WHAT DID YOU DO!?

[Thomas Jefferson]
Oh Abigail was begging. Begging for more. She was like, "oh give me that Virginian di*k." She loves it in Virginia. She hates New Englanders like you. You should've known better.

[John Adams]
YOU SON OF A b*tch! I KNEW I SHOULD f*ckING KILL YOU! I'M GONIG TO f*ck YOU TOO RAH RAH RAH!

[Thomas Jefferson]
WE'RE GOING TO FIGHT OLD MAN! I'M GOING TO f*ck YOUR BUTT!

[George Washington]
YOU TWO BETTER SHUT THE f*ck UP! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!? WE'RE SUPPOSED TO BE MAKING A COUNTRY AND YOU'RE FIGHTING! GET OUT OF MY BUILDING! YOU'RE BANISHED FROM THIS COUNTRY! GO!
[John Adams]
Ah, I'm sorry Mr. President. I didn't mean to.

[Thomas Jefferson]
Me too Mr. President, I'm sorry. We didn't mean anything we said. We'll be good.

[George Washington]
I DON'T CARE! GET! OUT! NOW!

[John Adams and Thomas Jefferson]
*cries* I'm sorry

[George Washington]
Oh that was straight fire on the track!
*Moans softly*