Psychoanalysis (2017) lyrics

[Intro]
Yeah, Webby
I took an Ambien the other night
And like stayed up
And I got to thinkin'
And then I wrote this
Yeah

[Verse]
I'm aware I'm a little nuts and I know I'm a headcase
Unpredictable moods are a toll that the stress takes
I carry the world's weight 'til my shoulders and neck ache
And my sanity been going downhill like a sled race
All day my legs shake like a nervous tick
This Adderall don't work for sh*t
It only gives me thoughts that got me worried sick
Feelings are so bottled up
The cork is decomposin' (Yeah)
And if this sh*t gets opened
It'll cause a damn explosion
With overflowin' emotions that I kept pushed down
Like it was someone I was trying to drown
I know it now
I'm a little tightly strung and see, I know I need to find a doctor (Ah-ha)
A therapist and a shaman who got some ayahuasca
To get to the bottom of the problems that have followed me
Robbin' me of my happiness subconsciously
Since I was a punk puttin' on a front
All 'cause I was insecure
Sucked at gettin' girls even more than I did at sports
The last kid that they would pick when we would shoot hoops
And sh*t, I get it, man
Don't nobody wanna lose
I never fully fit in when I was part of the crew
Which is cool now but left me all confused as a youth (Yeah)
I'm comfortable with who I was so I started doin' drugs
Because they let me take a break from livin' as the dude I was
Thought I'd never lose the buzz
Psh, I was wrong though
Been tryna function sober, but this sh*t'll be a long go (Yeah)
I've given and I've given
When is it my turn to take?
Been the odd one out but sh*t, even is all I break
Spent my whole adult life steady buildin' a fan base
While learnin' from mistakes and tryna find my happy place
I'm survivin' off of what I make
There's kibble up in Moose's dish
Its better than it was when I had nothin', but the truth is this
I spend the lion share to reinvest up in this music sh*t
You think that I'd still live at my parents if I was super rich?
Or somewhat wealthy?
This sh*t ain't healthy the way I'm stressin' sh*t
And still, I'm doin' it
To be honest, I'm obsessed with it
I never let it steer me on this verbal path of excellence
And still, I'm hardly credited, mentioned, to get respect for this (What the f*ck?)
I've lost relationships so I could keep on chasin' this
Respected all my elders during every step I take in this
Let others have the turn while I would wait for this
So now I'll kill you with my bare hands if you in the way of this
I'm sick of feelin' like I still got sh*t to prove to you
What? I gotta go on Sway again for a salute from you?
Go pull some dumb publicity stunt shot by a movie crew
Just to be in the same conversation as all these newer dudes? (f*ck that)
And I'm not sayin' that I'm the best or that I'm perfect
It's been almost twenty years, I just want to know it was worth it (Yeah)
All those hours spent diggin' deeper than the surface
Just to please other people with the talent I was birthed with
Life is passin' and I barely seen the half of it
I let it fuel the fire in my soul and keep me passionate
But at what point does this become unhealthy?
Yo, I'm askin' it
As I continue givin' myself this psychoanalysis
[Outro]
Yeah-yeah, psychoanalysis
Givin' myself the psychoanalysis
Yeah, psy-psy-psy-psy-psy-psy-psy-psy
Givin' myself the psychoanalysis
Yeah-yeah
You know, Webby
2017 sh*t, uh
Still chemically imbalanced as a motherf*cker
CT