Sleazy P. Martini Intro lyrics
by GWAR
Howdy, kids. This is Sleazy P. Martini, entrepreneur extraordinaire, and welcome to the show. You know, if you wanna survive a GWAR show, the best way is to be sure and wear a GWAR t-shirt, and the best way to get a GWAR t-shirt is to head over to your local merchandising stand right this minute where we have three styles of t-shirt to choose from: black, blank, and muddled. You know, I've been accused of using subliminal advertising (pus*y), but nothing could be further from the truth (Blowjob). In fact, I'd like to respond to these charges by saying this (f*ck me): We would never use such sneaky tactics. In fact, we come right out and say it: Buy a GWAR t-shirt and you will get laid! That's right, a personal guarantee from Sleazy P. Martini himself. In fact, if you buy over $50 worth of merchandise, our merchandising man will give you a blowjob himself! So make sure and ask about this special deal before you get your t-shirt. Hey, w- w- hey, what's go- what's going on here, something cutting in, hey-