Gone Girl: Nick Proposes lyrics

INT. SOMEWHERE - SOMETIME

CLOSEUP of a DIARY, a PEN—advertising AMAZING AMY—is
cursiving across. The eraser topper is a BRIDE with VEIL. The date is February 24, 2007. We see the words as we hear:

AMY (V.0.): Amazing f*cking Amy is getting f*cking married! That’s how the night started.

INT. UPSCALE NEW YORK RESTAURANT - NIGHT

TINY book launch party. Posters advertise the AMAZING AMY book series—all 20. “Written by RAND and MARYBETH ELLIOTT—two psychologists—Who are parents JUST LIKE YOU!”

AMY (V.0.): With me—regular, flawed, Real Amy—jealous, as always, of the golden child. Perfect, brilliant Amazing Amy. Who is getting f*cking married.

NICK and Amy are tight together. Waiters are circulating drinks, wearing T—shirts with an impish Amazing Amy and her TRADEMARK line: If it’s worth doing, it’s worth doing BRIGHT!

NICK: Now you can say you came. And in 10 minutes we’ll leave.

AMY: Perfect, time for a quick tour of my failings.

They walk along the wall of BOOK POSTERS. Stop in front of a
poster of: gradeschool AMAZING AMY holding a CELLO. A MUTT
beside her.

AMY (CONT’D): When I was 10 I quit cello. In the next book, Amazing Amy became a prodigy.

Next POSTER: teen AMAZING AMY playing volleyball.
NICK: You don’t play volleyball.

AMY: I got cut freshman year. She made varsity.

They continue their tour.

NICK: And how long did you have a dog?

AMY: She got a dog. Puddles made her more relatable.

They stop in front of the biggest poster: Amazing Amy, in a bridal veil, a BLAND GROOM next to her. The banner reads: 30th Anniversary Special Edition-AMAZING AMY AND THE BIG DAY.

NICK: I love your parents, but they can be as*h*les.

In the center of the limp party, RAND and MARYBETH, 60s,
cheerily hand out commemorative PENS-identical to the one Amy
used for her DIARY. Rand spots them—hands them each a pen.

RAND (to Amy): Hey, sweetheart, this is a big night for your mom. It would mean so much to her if you’d talk to a few reporters. Bloggers. Give ‘em a little “Amy” color.

Painful pause.

RAND (CONT’D): People want to hear from you.

AMY: We can’t stay long
RAND: Fantastic! Fifteen minutes, tops!

As Rand strides away, Nick gives Amy a look.

AMY: This is why I have my trust fund, my Brooklyn brownstone. I can’t really complain.

NICK: Your parents plagiarized your childhood.

AMY: No, they improved upon it, and then peddled it to the masses.

Marybeth pops up, a little tipsy, hugs them.

MARY BETH: I thought you were going to wear white to match the wedding theme.

AMY: I thought that’d be embarrassing.

MARY BETH (half joking): If it’s worth doing--

NICK: It’s worth doing...how’s that go?

BRIGHT! BRIGHT! The waiters are everywhere in the T-shirts.

NICK (CONT’D): Tip of my tongue...

MARYBETH: You’re very cute, Nick. Amy, you know what would make Dad’s night
AMY: I’m on it. (to Nick) I love having strangers pick at my scabs.

INT. - BAR CORNER - NIGHT

Amy, standing at a c*cktail table, deals with a montage of New York media types. NICK hovers nearby.

EARNEST GIRL: I’m curious whether it’s difficult for you to watch Amazing Amy heading down the aisle

FASHIONISTA: -and this big party celebrating this fictional wedding

NERVOUS INTERN: Because my understanding is that you are not married

ABOVE-IT-ALL JOURNALIST: Correct?

AMY: Correct. Amazing Amy is always, always one step ahead of me.

Nick cuts in, blocks the journalist.

NICK: I have a few questions.

AMY: Ah, it’s you.

NICK: I am here in a strictly journalistic capacity.

He elaborately sets out pad, pen. AMY prepares to be amused.

NICK (CONT’D): Amy, you’ve had the pleasure of dating Nick Dunne for how long?

AMY: Two magical years.

NICK: Is it true that during the course of your relationship, you have performed such gracious gestures as (checking notes)
not correcting Nick when he pronounced quinoa as kwin—o—a.

AMY: An understandable mistake.

NICK: He also thought it was a fish.

AMY: He thinks Velveeta is a cheese.

NICK: Touché.

AMY: I think it’s pronounced tow—chay.

NICK (laughing): You also manage to appear surprised and delighted when Nick’s elderly mother breaks into “New York, New
York” every...time....she sees you.

AMY (crooning): These bag of bone shoes...

NICK: You also bought Nick his first pair of scissors, correct?

AMY: And matching stapler.

NICK: Amy Elliott, you are beyond amazing. You are incredibly smart but entirely unsnobby. You are kind but never a martyr. You surprise me. You challenge me.

(MORE)

NICK (CONTD): And—fun fact for our readers—you have a world—class vagina.

Amy chokes on her drink.

NICK (CONT’D): However my colleagues inform me that as yet you are not married.

AMY: I am not.

NICK: Isn’t it time we fixed that?

AMY (V.0.): Then the night wasn’t so bad anymore.